As leaders, we’re often the last to admit when something isn’t working. We push through, we soldier on, and we tell ourselves that feeling dread about returning to work after a break is just… normal.
But is it?
Most of us need a few days to transition back from “beach mode” to “boardroom mode” – that’s completely natural. However, if you’re experiencing intense dread or questioning your role as a leader, it might be time for a reset.
Six Questions to Ask Yourself
1. How long was your break?
Many people assume a longer break means better rest and reset. However, research suggests a different picture. Having several shorter breaks throughout the year has similar positive wellbeing outcomes as one long vacation. So be realistic about your expectations – that three-week escape won’t necessarily solve everything.
Interestingly, the same research found that the type of vacation matters more than the length. Time for good sleep, good fun, and good food is what actually restores us.
2. Is this just post-holiday blues, or do you feel it after weekends too?
Research shows most people experience a dip in wellbeing about a week after returning to work, settling back to pre-holiday levels. That’s normal adjustment. However, if you’re dreading Monday every single week, that’s a red flag signaling something deeper may need attention.
3. How long did it take you to stop thinking about work during your break?
As leaders, completely disconnecting can take a few days. But if you spent most of your holiday checking emails, ruminating on workplace challenges, or unable to switch off, take notice. This constant preoccupation isn’t sustainable.
4. When did the dread start?
Last day of holidays? Normal. A week before you return? Not okay – and it means you didn’t even get to enjoy your time off.
If you experienced dread for most of your holiday and the thought of returning filled you with anxiety throughout, this warrants a deeper review of what’s driving those feelings. If you’re dreading work every Sunday night, something needs to change.
5. What’s driving this feeling?
Are you lacking challenge or purpose in your leadership role? Or are you dealing with ongoing conflict, unreasonable pressure, or ethical issues in your workplace?
The first might require redesigning your role or finding new challenges. The second might need you to address toxic dynamics or consider if this environment aligns with your leadership values.
6. Where do you find meaning?
Leadership should provide meaning and purpose alongside the paycheck. If you’re getting all your fulfillment from life outside work, something’s off balance. Wellbeing comes from finding meaning across all life domains: home, physical, vocational, mental, and spiritual.
Final Thoughts
If your dread extends beyond work to most areas of life, or represents a significant recent change in your overall motivation, please speak with your GP about a mental health check-in.
For most leaders, periods of disengagement are normal. But they’re also signals worth heeding. Consider:
- Developing a reset plan – What would need to change for you to feel energized by your leadership role again? Can you redesign aspects of your work, delegate differently, or refocus on what matters most?
- Adding sources of meaning – Sometimes the answer isn’t changing your job, but enriching other areas of your life. My mum used to tell me to “get a hobby.” She was right. Learning something new or investing in other life domains can shift your entire perspective.
- Managing stress differently – Avoiding stress actually increases it. Learning to work with stress rather than against it can be transformative. Learn more about stress reset strategies here.
That way, your next return from a break can feel less like dread and more like possibility. Your leadership matters. Make sure you’re leading from a place that sustains rather than depletes you.
My hope is everyone gets the opportunity to reset. Me included!
Margie Ireland
Margie Ireland is the author of The Happy Healthy Leader – how to achieve your potential even during a crisis. Margie is a registered Psychologist, Leadership Coach and Workshop Facilitator, highly sought after to help Leaders and their teams navigate stress and change with healthier coping strategies, leading to happier, healthier and high-performing teams. For more information visit www.margieireland.com
